Saturday, December 19, 2009


Decorating the Christmas tree with John and Jason… it’s a cute little tree. Picture to follow soon... John ventured forth today while I was at work, and found a perfect Charlie Brown tree. And it’s a noble fir too. We’re doing a bird theme this year, with some funky things Jason wants to include. :) He’s feeling happy tonight. I love it when he's smiling. It’s a good thing.  

Coming across a box of Jen’s childhood ornaments brought me to tears. I gave both my children an ornament a year, even as adults, something that reflected their interests or an accomplishment in their lives. I wonder what happened to the ornaments I gave her. I think of things like that every so often. They are only things. They won’t bring her back. Why do I attach meaning to them? It’s a mystery.

I just want her to be with us, here in real life here. I know she’s here in spirit. I can feel her. I want more. sigh

And I know all is as it should be. 

 Little secret... I’m wearing my reindeer antlers as I’m typing. Isn’t that the silliest? :)


Cheryl said...

Where's the pic of you with your antlers? I want to see it.

Runner Gurl said...

You looked so freakin' cute in those antlers, gurlfriend. Weren't we looking for new traditions? I think that the antlers should definitely be one of them.

I don't pretend to know what you're going through with Jen, but I do know that after 30 years, I still miss my mom at Christmas. I have some of her ornaments on my tree. When I first unpack them each year, I am shocked at both how REAL they make her memory, and how much I still miss her sometimes.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...